Listen like a trampoline

Listening is a skill, and becoming great at it requires intentional and sufficient practice, much like becoming a pro athlete or musician by profession. However, hard work is not enough. We need to know what a great listener does and how far we are from becoming one so that we can take the first step in the right direction.

In this article, authors and leaders of a leadership management firm, Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman, studied results from a large sample size of almost 3,500 participants to find out what differentiates a great listener from the rest. The results are not surprising. My notion of listening well is limited and this article has made me more mindful and aware about every interaction.

Just like many, I've thought that I'm a relatively good listener since I tend to enjoy being the observer and listener. I've also learnt that a good listener pivots off the last few words spoken by the other party. Lastly, mirroring the other party in their actions was also encouraged. These tips have definitely helped me to listen more, but they are far from helping me become a great listener.

What impacted me most was the use of the word "trampoline" in the article to describe a great listener, and not a traditional sponge who listens passively. A great listener is an active listener who sincerely probes deeper into the insights that shape the other party, is skillful in encouraging rich discussion of ideas in an objective and non-competitive manner that energizes and exalts all parties. New possibilities arise and imagination runs freely as everyone feels safe and at ease to share openly.

Great listeners seek to bring forth a pleasant experience for all parties. They are concerned with being kind than being right. Theodore Roosevelt says it well. "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. "

#leadership #coaching #management

https://hbr-org.cdn.ampproject.org/c/s/hbr.org/amp/2016/07/what-great-listeners-actually-do